In my experience, under normal circumstances, children are naturally devastated when they learn that their parents are getting a divorce. It does not matter how old or young a child is; the news is heartbreaking. Even children in their 20’s and older often feel that their “rock” or home base has been taken away from them.
So, if divorce is eminent, how do you tell your child? In my practice I am often asked this question, so here are some thoughts:
Remember, no matter how big of a rotten, cheating, low-down scumbag your wife or husband is, they are still your child’s mother or father. Your child’s view of either of their parents should not be tarnished by your break up. That is not to say that if you have been treated unfairly you should not stand up for yourself. I am merely suggesting that you don’t bring your child into the mix.
Your child was made out of love; your child is truly your most treasured asset. You and your spouse share this miracle and you will have the honor to do so for the rest of your life, so don’t screw it up.